1. Recognize Perfectionists = Robots
So many women expect perfection from themselves as they go through their lives.
Most of us, consciously or not, hold ourselves to a standard of perfection, and assume the world does too.
Every day, this idea of perfectionism is reinforced for us in advertising and media. (Think about how many times you see the word “perfect” in commercials, especially ads aimed at women. Consider how tabloids pounce on celebrity “imperfections,” or how public figures are criticized for the smallest human mistakes.)
But human beings are fallible, changeable, and gorgeously diverse. Our beauty lies in our differences, our variability and our ability to learn from mistakes and grow.
If we were “perfect,” we’d be robots—and that would be boring!
I find it a whole lot juicier and more fulfilling to be a part of nature. In nature, “imperfections” create evolution, and make organisms stronger, more vital, and more sustainable.
Since we’ve bought into these messages that we’re supposed to be perfect at everything—from the way we look to our performance at work, to how we fulfill the roles of mom, daughter, partner or wife—we waste energy being hard on ourselves when we fail to live up to this impossible standard.
Think about how great it could be to free up all that energy, and spend it on creativity, appreciating yourself and others, and enjoying life.
It’s very possible! It involves accepting that “imperfections” are part of what makes life—and you!—most beautiful. Here’s how to do that:
2. Be Prepared for a Little Discomfort
As a perfectionist, easing up on yourself can feel a little scary at first.
If you wear a full face of makeup every day, then taking it off to reveal the unique beauty underneath—including so-called “flaws” like lines and wrinkles—can feel intimidating.
If you spend every workday making sure your supervisors know you’re executing impeccably and finishing every project on time, it can be downright terrifying to let folks know you need wiggle room on a deadline.
If you’re used to expecting perfection from yourself as a mom, a friend, a partner or a wife, allowing yourself to make mistakes, apologize, and learn from them can feel super vulnerable.
Being okay with our mistakes and imperfections is what allows us to grow.
And that initial discomfort in facing imperfection is a small price to pay for a life spent evolving, learning and expanding.
(Plus, that initial discomfort passes—pretty quickly!)
3. Practice Giving Yourself Permission
It’s unrealistic to expect yourself to suddenly be 100% comfortable with all the things we’ve been told all our lives are “flaws.”
In fact, expecting yourself to instantly embrace your flaws is a different kind of perfectionism!
Getting comfortable with imperfection is a practice.
It happens every time you look at your face in the mirror and get friendly to that new smile line you see.
Or every time you tell yourself “it’s okay” when you make a mistake at work or in a relationship.
Try practicing being gentle and flexible with yourself in little, daily ways. Give yourself permission to be “imperfect.”
In doing so, you might find that it naturally, gradually grows into a greater sense of ease.
4. Develop Your Own Standard
When you get down to it, this perfectionistic standard—especially for women—is pretty ridiculous.
Companies and advertising agencies designed this perfectionist idea to play on our fears that something is wrong with us, and get us to buy products that (we hope!) will help us fix it.
If you take a step back—enough to see that this standard is made-up and arbitrary—eventually a whole lot more space and freedom opens up.
That’s when you can develop your own standard for yourself—which is a whole lot more fun than trying to live up to someone else’s.
Try it now: What qualities do you actually admire? Which practices would you like to try? What’s ideal for you?
(Hint: it probably has something to do with what makes you feel really good and connects you to your joy, which inspires people around you and guides you to expansion, beauty and growth.)
All our pro-age Boom cosmetics and skin care are designed to make you feel beautiful as YOU, at every age. (No perfectionism required.)
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